SCENE FROM THE VIEW

What do pink roses, many scented candles, classical music and elegant food conjure up in your mind? Yes, of course a "True Romance" party. Or in the more common vernacular, a toy party. My daughter held one at our house this week and the setting was almost too elegant for the "toys" demonstrated. Although I have always believed that the mind and imagination are the best erogonous zones, there is something to be said for ambience and "teaching aids"- LOL.

Although I was not sure that I would fit in with these 20 something girls, I must admit they were quite uninhibited and open in their discussions of the art of love and as they told me from the onset "what gets said in a True Romance party stays in the True Romance party". It's nice to know that love is alive and well and these young married ladies.

I especially enjoyed the cute acronyms that were used to describe the names of certain, shall we say, appliances. No doubt that brings an element of the personal into the errr, errr, use of said appliance-not quite a stranger don't you know. Although the demonstrator did say that one woman just refers to her menagerie of toys as BTY's or (better than you). Amazing what technology goes into these items. I was totally fascinated with the engineering that was demonstrated. However if you ask me, obviously some were designed by men and others were designed by women. Sorry people, there is a difference.

TERMINAL SCENES

Loss creates life or at least new beginnings. I have been reminded of this more than once this week oddly enough. Although I know all things come to an end and new creation must occur on the death of what came before I cannot help but lobby for continuance and the absence of change.

Loss occurs every day in moments both mundane and profound. Hair cells, skin cells, plaque, bugs, darkness, light, projects and people. It has been said "the only constant is change". Many times the change is subtle sometimes dynamic with a crash. Sometimes with a quiet breath that no one notices. The only difference is the air has an aroma of forgotton perfume, the smell of ozone, the odor of failure. All we know instinctively is something is diminished. What is remarkable is that the building up is already occuring whether we recognize it or not. Whether we accept it or not.

These things, these beginnings will continue whether we are ready to accept them or not. All we can hope for is that we can eventually breathe that new air, relish that new perfume or love again.

HOW TO FOCUS

I read two things recently that seem to have a lot in common and provided me some intriguing insights. The first dealt with yoga and meditation as a means of de-stressing. Of course, although it takes many years of practice to become proficient, something in the article triggered. It mentioned the art of "being in the moment". Being in the "now" not five minutes before or ten minutes later, but enjoying the feeling of right this second and focusing on what is happening right now.

Easier said than done but something worth pursuing. Have you ever driven the same route every day and realized you remember nothing you noticed on the trip but were all about the destination. That is the point, and apparently acts as a major calming influence.

Being on the Atkins treadmill recently I monitor what I eat closely. However I still need those minor indulgences to avoid homicide. I took time to focus on eating a Hershey's Dark Chocolate Truffle. Admired the shiny golden orange wrapper; unwrapped and examined the deep rich brown and incredible aroma of cocoa; popped the candy in my mouth and totally let the rich flavors fill my mouth (important to close your eyes to focus at this point). HMMMMMMM

Second event. I just finished reading several posts at the Sandbox which is a webmail address sponsored by doonesbury.com for American service men and women to post their unedited and uncensored thoughts. These are people speaking directly from the war zones. Some were tragic, some humorous, some sad. Some were well written and some were just written from the heart. However they all had one thing in common-they were powerful observations from people doing an unimaginable job.

The ease of electronics has allowed these war-driven missives to impact thousands of people instantly and I encourage people to check it out. Anyway, what do these two topics have in common. If you really want to understand the concept of living in the moment go to war! There is no question that these people's very survival depends upon their focusing on the here and now for their very lives and they already know their thoughts of yesterday as well as their dreams of tomorrow will reveal themselves at the appropriate time.....

PRESIDENTIAL SCENE

As I sit here watching Gerald Ford's funeral I am struck by how many times I hear the phrase "midwestern" way of doing things. As if family cohesion, modesty, straight talking and logical reactions to situations is only a legacy of the midwest. As a born and bred Michigander and former resident of Grand Rapids for several years, I am both flattered and puzzled. Regardless of the make-up of your family, your background and who your ancestors are, most Americans exhibit these same attributes.

However we tend to provide fame, notoriety and attention to segments of our population who least deserve it. Most of us deal with the devastating arrows of life through quiet strength and responsibility, taking care of the issues, protecting our families and moving on. We are told we receive the government we deserve, yet it appears we elect people based upon a popularity contest or whose nasty ad we heard last. I do believe that our choice of leaders are carefully orchestrated and we never hear about the honest, straight talker unless we search form them-men and women. I would rather have someone vote with their brains wide open, looking at the facts and even change their mind if they need to, over someone who blindly follows partisanship out of fear of others.

Although I admire a free press, we need to go beyond the sound bites and do our own research. Unfortunately so much of what passes as "news" appears to be the flavor of the hour or as a PR person put it "if it bleeds it leads". I believe we receive the news that we deserve and it is time to start asking for the truth and the difficult rather than the entertainment.

So this isn't all heavy I will pass on a joke my sister came up with New Year's Eve. Nasty, politically incorrect but funny. "With the passing of Gerald Ford, James Brown and Sadaam in the past week they are greeted at the pearly gates with the exclamation Oh Look, it's the Good the Bad and the Ugly."