Not sure if I heard it right, but had this brain spark while half-listening to a commercial for a cold remedy. Did the announcer really say "coughsequences" or "consequences" of not taking the medication. If I heard it wrong and my own warped brain picked it up as the former, then how witty am I? Remember your saw the birth of the new word here first.
Stopped at a restaurant for breakfast that I have patronized for several years on Saturdays before grocery shopping. I always have the same wait-person and do not even have to order as my coffee, water and ham and cheese omelet (hold the taters) arrives shortly after my sliding into the booth. Going on a Monday, however changes things. My favorite wait person was not working today and I had the monumental challenge of dealing with a previously foreign menu and remembering what "my usual" would be. I said "well things change but the jelly never does". This is in reference to the fact that every restaurant orders from the same vendor supplying grape, strawberry, mixed fruit and orange marmalade but NEVER NEVER cherry-even in Traverse City. What is up with that? And really who eats marmalade (the chick jelly - Ma me laid) complete with orange peel unless a person is suffering from scurvy. Nothing like a chunk of chew with your favorite citrus as of course people eat oranges like apples chomping down on the skin as part of their enjoyable treat. I don't think so!
Monday, January 26, 2015
Sunday, January 25, 2015
THIRD QUARTER
When they asked what I wanted I said a really good pen- well guess what? I got it, two actually, and a couple of journals to fill. A sign? A fulfillment? A prophesy to be fulfilled? Well have paper, will write. The weirdest, but perhaps flattering theme is everyone keeps asking what are you going to do? Apparently I am too young (looking) and vibrant to just veg. The sin is I have no plan-it will evolve I'm sure. And by the way, those are really fine pens. Comfortable to the hand and smooth rolling writing surfaces that pull thoughts and stories out all by themselves. Perhaps magic is embedded in gifts given from the heart of true friends.
First few days of the final third of life. Ooh that sounded creepy. Let me explain - lst third of life culminating in my daughter; 2nd third the incredible body of work by working incredibly hard "for someone else" though I am proud of that work. Now a third left to do something else, lots of something else's according to things that have opened up. Gosh Mrs. Kelley would be appalled at my license to be grammatically and spelling-incorrect, but I'll just call it EG (eccentric grammar). I now am the grammar police of my crimes and I give myself a pass. Also using ink in a hand-written journal keeps one humble and unexpectedly honest as you can't really go back and edit when you put it in writing without causing a lot of speculation of why is that crossed-out, scribbled or rewritten? It is obvious when one writes by hand. The flow of pen over paper may be comforting and sensuous but obvious when you err. You have no idea when it is keyed in and printed. TIP: If it seems as if my spelling has gone to proverbial "crap" that is because I'm excited and trying to type faster than the keyboard can accommodate.
On commercials- oh don't get me started. I have seen this one about 100 times. Question: If I was suffering from long-term bi-polar depression (well at least half the time if I understand "bi") would I be cognizant enough to know I needed it and beseech my doctor for said drug? A drug that I will self-prescribe because the television or the internet told me so? If I know it than maybe I don't suffer the malady or on the upside I think I'm just fine which would not prompt me to ask for it. Thank goodness for advertising that helps me not only diagnose, but treat and apparently, cure all my illnesses. Gosh many times I don't even realize I have the illness until a commercial or lawyer advertisement tells me what to take or who to sue. Only in America. Of course, we are one week away from the mother lode of all commercialdom - the SUPER BOWL! And I really don't think I am the only one who hits the bathroom during the game so I don't miss any commercials.
First few days of the final third of life. Ooh that sounded creepy. Let me explain - lst third of life culminating in my daughter; 2nd third the incredible body of work by working incredibly hard "for someone else" though I am proud of that work. Now a third left to do something else, lots of something else's according to things that have opened up. Gosh Mrs. Kelley would be appalled at my license to be grammatically and spelling-incorrect, but I'll just call it EG (eccentric grammar). I now am the grammar police of my crimes and I give myself a pass. Also using ink in a hand-written journal keeps one humble and unexpectedly honest as you can't really go back and edit when you put it in writing without causing a lot of speculation of why is that crossed-out, scribbled or rewritten? It is obvious when one writes by hand. The flow of pen over paper may be comforting and sensuous but obvious when you err. You have no idea when it is keyed in and printed. TIP: If it seems as if my spelling has gone to proverbial "crap" that is because I'm excited and trying to type faster than the keyboard can accommodate.
On commercials- oh don't get me started. I have seen this one about 100 times. Question: If I was suffering from long-term bi-polar depression (well at least half the time if I understand "bi") would I be cognizant enough to know I needed it and beseech my doctor for said drug? A drug that I will self-prescribe because the television or the internet told me so? If I know it than maybe I don't suffer the malady or on the upside I think I'm just fine which would not prompt me to ask for it. Thank goodness for advertising that helps me not only diagnose, but treat and apparently, cure all my illnesses. Gosh many times I don't even realize I have the illness until a commercial or lawyer advertisement tells me what to take or who to sue. Only in America. Of course, we are one week away from the mother lode of all commercialdom - the SUPER BOWL! And I really don't think I am the only one who hits the bathroom during the game so I don't miss any commercials.
Tuesday, January 20, 2015
Love Explained
Love is standing in place -- not about winning and losing; not about getting one up on one another; making a better deal; holding one another hostage to their own tender feelings to make them feel week and defeated. Love means accepting who they are without thoughts of or need for changing them. Equals no matter what because flaws do not exist where one has pure love. Not seeing any negative but only delight whether things change or not. If you cannot be unselfish, undemanding or not delighted in what you have found, it is not love. Love is not a competition and one may not know to love like that but we all need to try. When you feel ready to take on the world but they do not recognize the beauty and quality of your love it really doesn't matter. If you never regret the love that you have given or shared, you have found true love.
Sunday, December 29, 2013
The Power of Christmas Chapter 1
It was going to be different this year and it was. Just not what we had anticipated. As the saying goes, make plans and God laughs.
For the first time in many years Grandma was coming to enjoy great grandson Joseph's reaction to Christmas. Arriving between snowstorms on Saturday was the first miracle. Of course as usual I was sporting my end-of-year illness. Don't know what it is about holidays or vacation time, but I tend to get sick. And it's not pretty-red eyes, harsh cough, miserable all over. The type of cold that scares small children & causes cats to hiss. Everything was ready & the next to last run to the store for supplies had occurred as we all settled in for a long-winter's nap puncutuated by my hacking a lung up every few minutes. Thus I was able to hear the constant and glorious gunshot sound of tree limbs snapping and falling throughout an ice storm filled night.
At 4:30 am an alarm sounds as Grandma's oxygen machine goes into emergency shut-off mode. Ruh roh. We wake Grandma and hook her up to the battery operated model hoping to see power back within our 4-hour window. No such luck. Dragging the 30 year old generator from the basement, we needed to drain all the old gas out before we could attempt ignition. We were both covered with gas vapors as well as the floor of the garage, rugs, etc. by the time that little task was completed. Good news - the trusty ancient generator starts on the 3rd pull! Ok we're good for a while & able to charge up Grandma's machines. On the phone to find a hotel, as something tells me this "ain't" gonna end quickly or neatly.
Scored a room & we headed to check-in before the similarly affected powerless got there. After checking in we headed off to find breakfast and hit 3 places before we found one that was 1) with power; 2) not packed or at least a reasonable wait. Back to the hotel running on battery power. Got through the outside door & entered a dark? hallway. With a sinking feeling, I felt my way down the hall on emergency lights only to find the hotel had lost power in that 30 seconds between getting through the outside door and hitting the hallway. Humerous aside, Burt was stuck outside the hotel with a pile of equipment, because duh, the door locked behind us when we went in. Tried calling my cell phone to no avail as it was with my gear in the darkened hallway. Making my way to the front desk & gently (for me)suggested they needed to have some explanation or game plan for the hordes who would be making their way to the front desk to find out what the "H" they were going to do for them? They were reluctant to venture any ideas, but I did find out they had no back-up generator.
I promptly solicted a note from the manager to cover their lack of accomodation as they already had my credit card. Anther humerous note. The one in a million time that I actually shopped at Target was during the nasty time of stolen cards so obviously I was a little sensitive to bogus charges being applied. I really feel for the family who was having their family Christmas party in the hotel conference room with the husband optimistically saying, hey there's enough light through the windows to do this thing. I can't describe the looks he was getting.
Racing across the street to another hotel (I know-what was the logic in that?), I found they were freshly out of power too, though I did see their elevator going up-wondered what that was all about. Turns out a power pole had snapped just up the street moments before taking the transformer with it. We discovered that piece of intelligence as we tried to go south & found our way blocked by the afore mentioned power pole and a mess of wires in the road. As it is now afternoon, looking for hotels now became a crisis issue or at least a power issue. I envisioned sitting in an open McD's plugging in our oxygen machine. Appearances are nothing in crisis mode. Making our way to another hotel, I entered the lobby to hear that power had flickered, all computers were down & they weren't making any guarantees. Back in the car, I started calling hotels finding either no answer or no power. Back into the iffy hotel only to hear two parties ahead of me that they were booked.
Heading to another hotel a short distance away, I threw myself on the mercy of the front desk. Crazy scene. The phone rang constantly & the front desk person had a housekeeper helping her. Remember I am sporting the red-eyes & hacking cough of the truly deranged. Finally, with a catch in my voice, I said "hey-I am here before the phone call people". They agreed & found a room on the 3rd floor with a bed & fold-out couch, and miraculously-electrical plugs!
Ok-recharging completed. Everyone exhausted a quick run to the nearby Wendy's would suffice for dinner. After an hour wait (yes there were that many people) they had run out of chili, potatoes, etc etc. Chicken was left in abundance for some reason. Drama over for the day, well not quite.
At approximately 12:30 am the familiar alarm of a powerless oxygen machine goes off. Really dude. Pitch black fumbling around trying to shut the d--- thing off switch to battery mode. Meanwhile the sound of the alarm awakens the 3rd floor & we hear the excited voices of our neighbors trying to figure out what's going on. After turning it off, we just laid low & didn't enlighten anyone of what caused the alarm. It could have been a mob thing out there... Anyway an hour and half later the lights came back on and stayed on. Whew.
For the first time in many years Grandma was coming to enjoy great grandson Joseph's reaction to Christmas. Arriving between snowstorms on Saturday was the first miracle. Of course as usual I was sporting my end-of-year illness. Don't know what it is about holidays or vacation time, but I tend to get sick. And it's not pretty-red eyes, harsh cough, miserable all over. The type of cold that scares small children & causes cats to hiss. Everything was ready & the next to last run to the store for supplies had occurred as we all settled in for a long-winter's nap puncutuated by my hacking a lung up every few minutes. Thus I was able to hear the constant and glorious gunshot sound of tree limbs snapping and falling throughout an ice storm filled night.
At 4:30 am an alarm sounds as Grandma's oxygen machine goes into emergency shut-off mode. Ruh roh. We wake Grandma and hook her up to the battery operated model hoping to see power back within our 4-hour window. No such luck. Dragging the 30 year old generator from the basement, we needed to drain all the old gas out before we could attempt ignition. We were both covered with gas vapors as well as the floor of the garage, rugs, etc. by the time that little task was completed. Good news - the trusty ancient generator starts on the 3rd pull! Ok we're good for a while & able to charge up Grandma's machines. On the phone to find a hotel, as something tells me this "ain't" gonna end quickly or neatly.
Scored a room & we headed to check-in before the similarly affected powerless got there. After checking in we headed off to find breakfast and hit 3 places before we found one that was 1) with power; 2) not packed or at least a reasonable wait. Back to the hotel running on battery power. Got through the outside door & entered a dark? hallway. With a sinking feeling, I felt my way down the hall on emergency lights only to find the hotel had lost power in that 30 seconds between getting through the outside door and hitting the hallway. Humerous aside, Burt was stuck outside the hotel with a pile of equipment, because duh, the door locked behind us when we went in. Tried calling my cell phone to no avail as it was with my gear in the darkened hallway. Making my way to the front desk & gently (for me)suggested they needed to have some explanation or game plan for the hordes who would be making their way to the front desk to find out what the "H" they were going to do for them? They were reluctant to venture any ideas, but I did find out they had no back-up generator.
I promptly solicted a note from the manager to cover their lack of accomodation as they already had my credit card. Anther humerous note. The one in a million time that I actually shopped at Target was during the nasty time of stolen cards so obviously I was a little sensitive to bogus charges being applied. I really feel for the family who was having their family Christmas party in the hotel conference room with the husband optimistically saying, hey there's enough light through the windows to do this thing. I can't describe the looks he was getting.
Racing across the street to another hotel (I know-what was the logic in that?), I found they were freshly out of power too, though I did see their elevator going up-wondered what that was all about. Turns out a power pole had snapped just up the street moments before taking the transformer with it. We discovered that piece of intelligence as we tried to go south & found our way blocked by the afore mentioned power pole and a mess of wires in the road. As it is now afternoon, looking for hotels now became a crisis issue or at least a power issue. I envisioned sitting in an open McD's plugging in our oxygen machine. Appearances are nothing in crisis mode. Making our way to another hotel, I entered the lobby to hear that power had flickered, all computers were down & they weren't making any guarantees. Back in the car, I started calling hotels finding either no answer or no power. Back into the iffy hotel only to hear two parties ahead of me that they were booked.
Heading to another hotel a short distance away, I threw myself on the mercy of the front desk. Crazy scene. The phone rang constantly & the front desk person had a housekeeper helping her. Remember I am sporting the red-eyes & hacking cough of the truly deranged. Finally, with a catch in my voice, I said "hey-I am here before the phone call people". They agreed & found a room on the 3rd floor with a bed & fold-out couch, and miraculously-electrical plugs!
Ok-recharging completed. Everyone exhausted a quick run to the nearby Wendy's would suffice for dinner. After an hour wait (yes there were that many people) they had run out of chili, potatoes, etc etc. Chicken was left in abundance for some reason. Drama over for the day, well not quite.
At approximately 12:30 am the familiar alarm of a powerless oxygen machine goes off. Really dude. Pitch black fumbling around trying to shut the d--- thing off switch to battery mode. Meanwhile the sound of the alarm awakens the 3rd floor & we hear the excited voices of our neighbors trying to figure out what's going on. After turning it off, we just laid low & didn't enlighten anyone of what caused the alarm. It could have been a mob thing out there... Anyway an hour and half later the lights came back on and stayed on. Whew.
Monday, September 9, 2013
Senior Moment
Interesting. At what age do we become senior citizens? When we look mature? When we stage our first protest against advancing technology or refuse to succomb to the latest social media craze? Spoiler Alert- all twits that twitter do not have anything interesting to say. I might even suggest that 95-98% are, duhhh, boring. Who cares what party you went to, that was so exciting that you had to twitter while YOU WERE AT THE PARTY? If I was having a good time engaging people in interesting conversation or activities, I would not be 1) available to post about the experience, and 2) have time to post!
Is everyone interesting? No. Sorry all of you who were told you were special. We are all special, but find your own special; we are not all good at everything. Find your niche. I will appreciate that your special is different from mine. LOL.
Anyway, back to the original thought. Wendy's finds us "senior" at 55. So does McDs. Others require arrival at the 6th decade or higher. Ok. With so many baby boomers reaching these milestones every day, the benies of "senior" are being pushed higher and higher in age. I for one am happy. I can remain middle-aged or even younger for at least a little while yet. Of course that is based on where I ask for "senior" moment discounts. But believe me, I am not so vain as to refuse the special rates offered just by admitting I have put a few more years on this earth. And really, the teen-agers that are serving most of us wrote us off at 30 anyway, so what the heck?
Is everyone interesting? No. Sorry all of you who were told you were special. We are all special, but find your own special; we are not all good at everything. Find your niche. I will appreciate that your special is different from mine. LOL.
Anyway, back to the original thought. Wendy's finds us "senior" at 55. So does McDs. Others require arrival at the 6th decade or higher. Ok. With so many baby boomers reaching these milestones every day, the benies of "senior" are being pushed higher and higher in age. I for one am happy. I can remain middle-aged or even younger for at least a little while yet. Of course that is based on where I ask for "senior" moment discounts. But believe me, I am not so vain as to refuse the special rates offered just by admitting I have put a few more years on this earth. And really, the teen-agers that are serving most of us wrote us off at 30 anyway, so what the heck?
Sunday, November 18, 2012
Post Election
Guess I need to pull my Obama sign in from the front yard-have irritated the neighbors long enough. Though it seems the "r's" are still whining and complaining. Hey dudes - get over it. You insulted enough Americans to lose so learn something.
3 Observations --
1) OMG - 30 states have started petitions to peacefully secede from the US. Hello, this happens "EVERY" election - media report all the facts if you can-liberal press my sweet lily-white a--
2) There was no mandate for Obama. Really. Obama won by 2.9% in 2012 which is "HIGHER", yes higher, than that last 4 presidents - hmmm, surprise.
3) If we voted for the POTUS because of all the "FREE" stuff supposedly that was promised, then where's mine? Free stuff was offered by the other side, but only to the 1%-not enough of them apparently. Money doesn't always talk thank goodness.
Final thought. Nothing is free and we all pay taxes. Just some of us are in a little better position to "avoid" paying taxes that the 47% pay. I am not saying that is wrong, I am just saying don't stand on a high moral horse and judge the rest of us. No one escapes this life without paying.
No one gets a pass and we all need to forgive and work together for a better world.
Joy to All and Peace on Earth-maybe someday we will learn.
3 Observations --
1) OMG - 30 states have started petitions to peacefully secede from the US. Hello, this happens "EVERY" election - media report all the facts if you can-liberal press my sweet lily-white a--
2) There was no mandate for Obama. Really. Obama won by 2.9% in 2012 which is "HIGHER", yes higher, than that last 4 presidents - hmmm, surprise.
3) If we voted for the POTUS because of all the "FREE" stuff supposedly that was promised, then where's mine? Free stuff was offered by the other side, but only to the 1%-not enough of them apparently. Money doesn't always talk thank goodness.
Final thought. Nothing is free and we all pay taxes. Just some of us are in a little better position to "avoid" paying taxes that the 47% pay. I am not saying that is wrong, I am just saying don't stand on a high moral horse and judge the rest of us. No one escapes this life without paying.
No one gets a pass and we all need to forgive and work together for a better world.
Joy to All and Peace on Earth-maybe someday we will learn.
Sunday, October 28, 2012
OCTOBER RAMBLINGS
Ok -what observations can we exploit for humor today? Been awhile I know, so my funny bone may be rusty. Though rusty is a color I admire and certainly appropriate for this beautiful time of year.
1) My absolute favorite quote of the month "Sweat is fat cells crying". Certainly makes my stinky drippings at the "spa" (health club) become little badges of valor celebrating my dedication to the sweatier arts. Saw that quote in the cube of an employee I was interviewing for an audit. They no doubt thought I was writing down one of their "pearls" and I was just afraid I would forget the sign when I got done. Hey we both got what we wanted.
2) gov'nr rommelly - when he first started his campaign even the "r's" didn't want him - remember "anyone but Mitt?" Well who wants a mitten for prez anyway-warm but mindless. Not sure how to compare a mitten to flip flops but that seems to be the MO of this dude who basically agrees with whatever group he happens to be speaking with. How does that work in the real world when media, camera phones, tweeters record every waking moment of everyone's life? (Most of it boring I might add) That will work well in foreign policy-scarey.
3) Which leads to another thought. Why is it everyone's business to know every detail of every issue? I for one do not want to know what the gov't knows about foreign terriorism. It's hard enough to sleep at night as it is. Not telling everything on a "covert" operation may be in the best interests of those involved. Case in point - a California legislator leaked the names of those in Libia who are working with us; at great personal risk to themselves and their families. Yep, we can certainly be trusted with sensitive information. We don't know the whole story and perhaps we shouldn't.
4) Back to the "spa" for the next observation. When you go six to seven times a week you get to know the regulars and the fly by nighters. The latter tend to wear designer duds, make a lot of noise and hog machines which they don't wipe off don't you know. The best part of being a regular however, is you know they won't last. Before their tees & shorties get grungy, they are gone again. Doing their yearly bit for health until they find the next flavor of the month that promises results with minimal effort.
5) Which leads to another interesting fact. Due to the changing shape I have been experiencing due to my regular workouts, I am discovering clothing that had been cast aside now usable. Dug out a pair of knee high boots that rejected any effort on my part to zip up my shapely calves. Since I added run/walk to my routine they now zip all the way up with minimal effort, they actually zip up over, dare I say I have them, skinny jeans! Now clearly women of a certain age should not be wearing clothes that are clearly made for the younger crowd, but damn they look goooooddd...
6) Found out something interesting about the "little prince" - Joseph to the rest of the world. There is definitely a difference between little girls and little boys and it shows up early folks. Active little bugger even at 0 yrs and a couple of months and counting. Wigggles constanly no matter what, sleeps less than soundly and is easily bored. This from a kid who doesn't even crawl yet-but by golly he wants to walk! But the real telling thing is when he's fussing you can do something unexpected that startles or scares him momentarily and then he bursts into the belly shaking giggles. And you can do it over and over and over again and he loves it! I can see the day when Nana takes him to a scary movie-me with my hands over my eyes and him chortling with glee. Well at least I think I have found a family member who will enjoy roller coasters!
1) My absolute favorite quote of the month "Sweat is fat cells crying". Certainly makes my stinky drippings at the "spa" (health club) become little badges of valor celebrating my dedication to the sweatier arts. Saw that quote in the cube of an employee I was interviewing for an audit. They no doubt thought I was writing down one of their "pearls" and I was just afraid I would forget the sign when I got done. Hey we both got what we wanted.
2) gov'nr rommelly - when he first started his campaign even the "r's" didn't want him - remember "anyone but Mitt?" Well who wants a mitten for prez anyway-warm but mindless. Not sure how to compare a mitten to flip flops but that seems to be the MO of this dude who basically agrees with whatever group he happens to be speaking with. How does that work in the real world when media, camera phones, tweeters record every waking moment of everyone's life? (Most of it boring I might add) That will work well in foreign policy-scarey.
3) Which leads to another thought. Why is it everyone's business to know every detail of every issue? I for one do not want to know what the gov't knows about foreign terriorism. It's hard enough to sleep at night as it is. Not telling everything on a "covert" operation may be in the best interests of those involved. Case in point - a California legislator leaked the names of those in Libia who are working with us; at great personal risk to themselves and their families. Yep, we can certainly be trusted with sensitive information. We don't know the whole story and perhaps we shouldn't.
4) Back to the "spa" for the next observation. When you go six to seven times a week you get to know the regulars and the fly by nighters. The latter tend to wear designer duds, make a lot of noise and hog machines which they don't wipe off don't you know. The best part of being a regular however, is you know they won't last. Before their tees & shorties get grungy, they are gone again. Doing their yearly bit for health until they find the next flavor of the month that promises results with minimal effort.
5) Which leads to another interesting fact. Due to the changing shape I have been experiencing due to my regular workouts, I am discovering clothing that had been cast aside now usable. Dug out a pair of knee high boots that rejected any effort on my part to zip up my shapely calves. Since I added run/walk to my routine they now zip all the way up with minimal effort, they actually zip up over, dare I say I have them, skinny jeans! Now clearly women of a certain age should not be wearing clothes that are clearly made for the younger crowd, but damn they look goooooddd...
6) Found out something interesting about the "little prince" - Joseph to the rest of the world. There is definitely a difference between little girls and little boys and it shows up early folks. Active little bugger even at 0 yrs and a couple of months and counting. Wigggles constanly no matter what, sleeps less than soundly and is easily bored. This from a kid who doesn't even crawl yet-but by golly he wants to walk! But the real telling thing is when he's fussing you can do something unexpected that startles or scares him momentarily and then he bursts into the belly shaking giggles. And you can do it over and over and over again and he loves it! I can see the day when Nana takes him to a scary movie-me with my hands over my eyes and him chortling with glee. Well at least I think I have found a family member who will enjoy roller coasters!
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