TRAVEL TALES FROM THE UK, CHAPTER 2

I can try to keep this in order, but sometimes days or experiences run together in a total ethnic blur, so I will try to post in the approximate order of the trip. However I will take poetic license if something occurs to me and it's a different day. I believe it's the challenges and general screw-ups that stick in your mind after an adventure which is more interesting than trying to attain any kind of continuity. That will be my disclaimer for the moment anyway.

Couple of interesting things in UK hotel rooms-no clocks, teeny-tiny wastebaskets and the electrical challenge I mentioned earlier. Also the pub we enjoyed the first evening had an old-timey portrait of a previous owner???  With the surname of Pringle. So maybe our ancestors were in the pub business.  Makes sense as their crest features a sea shell so maybe they sold seashells or seafood by the seashore? Also when our tour director asked for our surname, I had to think what the heck that meant.  Yes, I know it's your family's hereditary last name, but not exactly how we ask your name here in the States as we think we are all brand-new creatures with no past or history.  History over there is anything that's at least 500 years old.  The 1700's are merely yesterday and the buildings are still there to prove it!
View of Victoria Station from Hotel Room

Day 2 - after we discovered we were located on the back of Victoria Station, a main hub for trains and buses, we realized the disembodied voices we had been hearing through the wall were actually announcements from the station.  After the Manchester bombing, we also realized we were attached to a possible target for terrorism. Then after the latest event on London Bridge and the Borough Market another chill went down my spine as I realized that was one of the stops we made on Day 2.

Knowing through the first day experience that we were the proverbial "babes in the woods" around the big City we were grateful that our travel rep appeared early the next day to walk us to our day tour pick-up location. She was right. We would have been waving good-by to that big double decker red bus if we had attempted the journey on our own.  Oddly enough, the tour dropped us at Westminster Abbey at the end of the day rather than taking us back to the starting point and said good luck.  Had to ask a bobby how to get back...We were going to tip that guide but decided not to after the "dump and run".

As the scheduled 15 day trip did not include a Tower of London or Westminster tour and the one thing I wanted to experience, a "formal" high tea, this optional tour supplied all the missing parts. The Tower of London was incredible with ancient buildings, the crown jewels, stern-faced British soldiers (separated by a fence so couldn't get close to try and make them smile-pooh) and the inevitable shopping arcade.  No matter where you go, and I assume by plan, there is always the inevitable shopping opportunities.  I did ask when in Ireland and observing the vast distances between villages, what people did for a living.  Essentially the answer was, "cater to the tourists". Well at least the landscape is not peppered with giant smokestacks and ugly warehouses. But spoiler alert; I was not that impressed with the crown jewels. Could be the masses of people blocking any good views, but I just thought there would be more.

Another odd compulsion of the tourists milling around the grounds of the Tower is their blood-thirsty desire to know exactly "where" the unfortunate Ann Boleyn "lost her head" (pardon the pun).  They fenced in an area and say vaguely "over there" somewhere. The lady who could not deliver a male heir and actually embraced Protestantism (more so than Henry 8) was instead accused of treason to justify her execution. Oh yes, life is so much better for women now, hmmmm.

Interesting story.  As long as the Ravens remain at the Tower of London it will never be destroyed. Well to assure that, they feed them well and make sure they do not fly too far away. A local celebrity is the lady below with the pink ribbon on her foot. A true drama queen she is known to collapse as if dead to the consternation of the onlookers. Then she pops up with a crow-equivalent "ta da" .  Tres Amuse!

Cannot get close enough to harass the "Beefeater" but note that is no pea shooter he is sporting...

I was more interested in the explanation of the castle garderobes. Essentially "privies".  As castle dwellers wore a lot of furs and heavy materials, and due to the absence of really good self-serve laundromats, folks believed if they hung the dirty garments in the castle toilet whatever nasties living (or decomposing) there would miraculously clean the garments. Something like if it smells that bad, then it has to be good for something?  One can only pity the lads who's job it was to shovel out these spaces occasionally.

At lunchtime, we made a stop at Borough Market and were cut loose for an hour. Clearly marking where the bus was we ventured into what is a mixture of the biggest flea market/garage sale and food court one has ever seen. One form or another of the Borough market has been in existence at this site for 1,000 years. Now even the Brits admit that's a long time.  It's where the "regular" folk got together to barter and exchanges services away from the castle folk. We promptly got lost. However in making our first purchase, we were told our 5 pound notes were out-of-date as of last Friday and we needed to go to a bank to exchange them. Apparently this happens frequently that they change notes or coins so tourists beware. Aside: we found the easiest way to make a purchase was lay all our coins out and let the vendor pick out what they needed. Seemed to work and I think everyone was honest. Remember they cater to tourists.  Anyway, we managed to find a bank. Another interesting adventure. You don't actually get to go into the bank proper. There are ATMs everywhere on the street, but being from the States, we go inside. You are met by uniformed people who ask you your business. Then they take care of it for you or allow you to talk to a bank clerk in a tiny little window peeking out of a very imposing wall. Very interesting. Not sure how you access the inner sanctum and conduct business but apparently very few do considering the number of people accessing the outside ATMs.  At any rate we got some wonderful cheese to go with my "free" Chardonnay from the plane and dinner was set. The market was interesting, masses of people and noise, free samples of cheese, pate, fruit, drinks. And we found our way back to the bus unscathed and on time. Whew.

Westminster was beautiful in its variety of architectures. Each ruler or dynasty added their own pieces to the cathedral based upon the style of the era. Yet the intricate Gothic lacework of stone and soaring towers framing its "Rose" window dominates. The interior, only glimpsed at Royal weddings was magnificent and pictures could not do justice. Amusing fact. After a lifetime of fighting each other rivals Queen Elizabeth and Mary, Queen of Scots are entombed side-by-side for all eternity. There is a knights section and a poets and writers section and significantly on the very threshold marks a most impressive tomb. If you have ever seen someone enter Westminster, you will note that they step to one side and go around something. That something, framed in brilliant red poppies is the tomb of the British unknown soldier. Perfect.

High tea was held in a café (and gift shop) housed in one of the adjacent out-buildings at Westminster which also includes a boy's school in the complex.  I now understand why Brits don't eat dinner until late in the day. Several trays were brought along with the teapots that were mounded with sandwiches, scones and every type of sweet confection one could possibly want and/or need. Sampling each, I not only did not require much dinner, but suffered for imbibing that many sweets. One item was basically fudge on fudgey cake covered in fudge. I blame the tea though. One of the people on the tour anointed herself queen of the tea and tried to divvy up which tray or teapot belonged to which group of people at the table. We all basically ignored her, as one, who died and left her in charge, and second, there was so much we couldn't possibly finish it all so we gorged like little piglets.  Burt, being a sport, tried tea. First he tried it straight - no. Next sugar-nope. Finally sugar and cream-definitely not. I however, did not have that problem the first time I tried Guinness. A tale for another day.

Dinner consisted of the previous mentioned cheese, crackers and wine. Plus I was nursing a tummy ache from the sugar explosion at tea.  ToBeContinued

TRAVEL TALES FROM THE UK

I was unable to post via computer on my trip, but did try to keep notes as we bounced along in the "coach", as the Brits call buses. The Burt-man and I planned a Great Britain/Ireland trip about 8 months ago which finally occurred May 10 to May 27. I say finally occurred as it was paid for about six months ago.  Between world terrorism events, disastrous election results and universal hacking It was questionable whether the trip would ever come to fruition. But soundly back in the US, I can try to recap the madcap.

Of course the final "cheeky monkey" moment occurred as we arrived at the Heathrow for our return trip. The airport is massive, duty free shops including Cartier, Gucci, Harrods, Hermes, Chanel, etc. line the terminals. It was also massively filled with passengers who were now without a flight due to a universal hacking of British airlines. Fortunately we were on Delta/KLM.  Controlled chaos punctuated with frustrated travelers and sulky children who were frantically trying to book alternate flights or hotels. We clutched our tickets tightly and formed a protective buffer to assure our escape.

But I ask you, who is buying expensive jewelry, handbags, clothing at the airport shopping center? Really, "I just had to pick up these diamond earrings-they go so well with my tee shirt and flip flops." Weird.  Also odd, is the lack of restrooms and eating areas besides the inevitable Nero Coffee shop and "artisan" sandwiches in a couple of locations.  Never did get the point of the artisan sandwiches. Also there seems to be a British fascination with mayonnaise with occurs with every sandwich without asking - right up there with "rocket" the spicy greens they put on cooked pizzas and brown sauce, lots of brown sauce which as far as I can tell is basically gravy. And this was rather odd. The first time I asked for an "iced tea" I was greeted with a blank stare. This is a country who loves its tea and has a tea/coffee shop every 100 feet or so.  Just add ice.  Oh well, I enjoyed my hot teas and coffee though they in turn thought me odd when I always refused the inevitable little pot of cream that is standard with your tea order. 

DAY ONE - of the UK adventure began with me totally nailing my to do list including four loads of laundry (a task I repeated upon return). Sheets on beds changed. Kristen and Joseph took us to the airport and when Joe heard we were going on a plane on vacation, he said he wanted to go on vacation too. He settled on a string of cherry licorice from the airport snack bar instead.

It was a little awkward connecting with the senior flight attendant (or purser) who needed to meet and greet each and every First and Business class passenger. They of the fluffy, comforters, reclining seats and hot and cold running attention. Jealously watched by those of us in steerage who made do with mystery filled pillows and a handy bulkhead to lean against. We alternated between slouching, twisting and the floor to get a few winks as we flew overnight.  Though like a hospital interruptions are frequent. Lights out at 10:30 pm followed by a water bottle and hot towel about 1/2 hour later; then a full lights on to enjoy a full course lasagna dinner at 11:30 pm.  Then peanuts thrust at us about 2 a.m. followed by breakfast at 5:30 am or so.  All of which was delicious if not conducive to any sleep on the flight. First class passengers of course had their meals chewed and digested by staff so as not to disturb their comfortable sleep.   But I digress.

When the purser finished her good will tour of 1st class she "popped" by my seat. I greeted her with a 2 lb. bag of M&Ms that I said was a reward for her difficult role she could keep for herself or share. Within minutes I was overwhelmed with grateful thanks punctuated by M&M candy smiles from the rest of the staff. One charming steward with a British accent thanked me for "the lovely chocolates". (Yep straight guys do say lovely over there). I felt good, they felt good. Everybody on board received a mellow trip. However, like the tooth fairy who works her magic under cover of darkness, the purser slipped a full bottle of Chardonnay (from 1st class) into my sleepy lap in quiet thanks.

The happy feeling lasted through the, oh approximately 1/2 mile walk to Customs. Welcome to the UK along with roughly 500 other arrivals in a stifling hall (as the trip progressed I learned that the UK is not big on air conditioning or screens on windows actually) filled with Disney-like rope channels designed to make you feel you're progressing when really you're just rotating in massive circles back and forth, back and forth. You eventually recognized your "line buddies" as you made your way around each turn. I resorted to dragging our strangely heavier (remember the bottle of wine I was now carrying) bag by its strap.

However there was not major noise, bickering, loud voices. The saving grace for British customs is we all just survived a multi-hour plane trip at night sitting bolt upright in teeny, tiny airplane seats No one had any fight left in them. Even small children followed zombie like with no happy attraction at the end of the endless line.

When it was our turn, I felt strangely guilty of what I don't know. Such is the solemnity of customs officials who determine whether you just popped a fortune and a plane ride from hell to be told "nope can't come in".  Course I was sweating the bottle of wine. (Reverse that feeling coming back through US Customs) Nope, our officer's major concern was whether we were returning to the States at the end of our trip. Yes Ma'am. She seemed oddly relieved as did we.

Another 1/2 mile to the round robin of men and women holding signs hoping to see my name as one of the privileged who "had a driver waiting". Nope, no such luck, no desk or office marking the name of our travel group as promised -poop. After asking three people I was finally directed to the Information desk marked strangely enough with a BIG I, duhhh. He directed us back to the driver circle in a particular location. Yes, there was the dude - 3rd row back with OUR NAME ON A SIGN! Cool. even if it was third tier.

After a breakneck ride through much of downtown London, we finally arrived at our hotel. Now I have seen some crowded down towns and on-street parking situations but this driver's skills were either professional level or foolhardy. Since no one died, I pick number one. He knew to the inch how much room he needed and I was forced to squeeze in my seat to be sure he made the turns and missed the hordes of motorcycles and bikes who dodge in and out of traffic including giant double deck buses at every corner. Couple that with the fact that they drive on the opposite side of the road I kept looking the wrong way. I kept braking sympathetically and turning throughout the 30 minute ride only I went the wrong way every single time.

It was quite amusing, based on the number of dead end streets, one way streets, round-abouts and curving roads that each intersection is marked LOOK RIGHT or LOOK LEFT. It was dizzying, but like any confident city dweller, they just roll with it. After a little confusion we just waited and crossed when the herd did - always looking the wrong way of course.

Exhausted and reaching our room we got a call from our travel group rep saying come on down, I'm only here until 3:30.  It was 2:30 groannnn. We hit the "facilities" and headed back down. Her advice was keep moving until 8 or 9 o'clock if you can. We did and promptly got lost going outside and around the block. Apparently they are not real fond of the "grid" system and straight streets. But we did see the walls of Buckingham Palace before losing my bearings. However we discovered the grandeur of Victoria train station before stumbling on the back door of our hotel which, how humorous is connected to the train station. Another fun fact, could not figure out how to turn on the lights. I think there was some instruction at check-in, but brain atrophy had set in at that point. Finally understood that you plug your room key into a slot to get any electricity. Great energy saver especially when the "foreigners" don't figure it out. Quite a clever idea actually.

Through the lobby and back out to the street to try this again and score some grub. The first stop was a place called Meat- appetizing. However after being seated we decided the "smell of Meat" was not anything appetizing and bolted. Next stop a pub where you either drink downstairs or go upstairs for food which comes up from downstairs on a dumb waiter.  Burt's lst fish and chips and my first meat pie. The upstairs by the way was labeled the "Ladie's Parlor". I guess that leaves the downstairs to the dedicated drinking and carousing.  We ordered what sounded like an interesting foreign beer only to read "American Pale Ale" on the label, oh well. Back to the room about 6:30 where we both promptly fell asleep waking at 8 to unpack. First tour tomorrow at 8. Tower of London here I come.  To be Continued

NOW WHAT?

Not sure which way to look as the drama continues.  This week, we could grind to a halt if a budget extension is not voted upon. All it needs is for  the legislature to cut off old and poor people from health care, allocate 1.4 billion to build a ridiculous and useless wall and pass tax reform (which apparently would only benefit the ultra rich and large businesses). We all know how well
"trickle down" economics works.  Not too large a buffet for the ultra-efficient Congress to put into place.  And leading the parade to third world status is chief red-headed clown DT.  Amazing first 100 days. 

Overshadowing that is the American "armada" steaming towards a confrontation with Korea. What year are we 1588?  That didn't work out so well for the Spanish. It appears that our clown-in-chief is acting like a small boy playing with his toy soldiers or enjoying a game of Stratego. This is not a game. These are not plastic figures and whoever has the most wins. These are the lives of young American men and women you are risking or, in your mind, mere chess pieces in your infantile quest to be the biggest bully on the block.

 When China has to chastise the United States of America not to be "reckless" that shows you how low our credibility and standards have shrunk.  What happened to the America that took care of the persecuted and the weak? When one is in a position of power, that is when you are expected to show mercy and restraint; to set an example of how civilization is supposed to look. When you have the ability to destroy at the flick of a button and are also able to easily defend yourself, you are the one that must show the most character even if the smaller, pathetic bully throws taunts your way. Words and pathetic attempts at warfare from a weaker opponent do not constitute any response other than a proverbial shake of the head at the foolishness and an assurance of support to our more vulnerable allies.

Again the uneducated buffoon at the helm is responding to the sad sword-rattling of a weaker nation that has already been condemned by all as he apparently does not understand if the US gets involved it becomes escalated to an unthinkable level. Those who do not read and understand history are doomed to disaster and the sad reality is that we are strong enough to withstand these challenges.

Hey according to DT, Korea was once a part of China so they probably want it back.  What a Boz...I don't think there is an emoji that covers what I'm feeling.  🙅

IT'S SPRING

We have a friendly contest in my family each year to herald Spring. Whoever spots the first legitimate robin and posts a picture of said robin gets bragging rights for the year.  Cannot be on the wing or too fuzzy to guess what it is. Since the accusation of fake robins on the wing one year, the rules have tightened somewhat. However I understand this year's winner tempted life and limb in a bank drive thru to obtain the prize winning picture so we're giving it to her.

I have changed the wreath on my front door as my grudging admission that yes, we have broken the back of winter's wrath.  That is not to say we won't have 8 inches of snow the first week of April, but as a seasoned Michigander, I know that is merely a last teaser from Mother Nature.  Yes, Ma'am we know you are in charge, but really this is it right? This winter was rather coy with days and weeks of warm weather and very few snowstorms. 

We did experience some rather dicey icy days that gave the school kids their days off.  I swear, sounding like an old person, we did not have that many days off when I was a schooler in Grand Rapids because we knew IT WAS WINTER and you get bad weather.  I think it is the proliferation of more buses, facebook and twitter that has galvanized parents to complain and threaten school officials if their little precious has to get their little "feets" wet or wear a winter coat.  Currently most teens wear flip flops and no coats through the winter so I see the parents' point. Though I still don't know why I pay so much for buses when literally 100s of parents drop and pick up their kids rather than subject them to the bus.

However I really believe in Spring when I see the chipmunk emerge from under the deck, or wherever he hides out during the winter and watch the squirrels cavorting across the yard and up and down the trees in wild pursuit.  I assume the squirrels are couples or they could be chasing some new tail, so to speak.  Hard to tell as with most species other than my own they all look alike to me. Much chatter occurs when the chasee believes the chaser is not committed to the game. Much like taunting or trash talking at a sporting event. I never see the finale or consummation of that mad dash around the yard, but I assume it is fruitful as new smaller squirrels emerge at a later date. 

I have to believe if they think it's time to bring new life into the world and chances of survival are good, then all is well.

THAT WAS THE WEEK THAT WAS!

The Art of the Deal and Master Negotiator is looking more like the Flim Flam Man after the failure of the "new and improved" health care plan.  Not all his fault of course. The Repugnants have had 7 years to work on repeal and replace.  They seemed to have failed on both accounts. Apparently the American public is a bit savvier than they anticipated and they let their legislators know.  Head ring master lives the old PT Barnum philosophy that "there's a sucker born every minute". Not enough suckers yet, to be crude. However, if people keep condemning the press, and if the press does not maintain the highest standards, these charlatans could actually succeed at one of their schemes to further rape the American public. Keep strong people! I haven't seen the public so galvanized since the Viet Nam era.

One longs for the days when newscasts had to provide both sides of the news, all opinions, actual facts for each side, etc. so that we could make more intelligent decisions and understand what is actually the truth. Once the gloves came off, conservative talk show hosts and alternate news stations only had to relay "their" interpretation of the facts. Thus we went from being a reasonably informed public to one that seeks out whichever talking head supports their "OPINION".  Not facts, opinion. 

However that trend served the "legitimate" press well as they were able to report the number of people who would lose their insurance; publicize starving the elderly and children by eliminating programs that "don't show a return"; and explain how the wealthy would see a tremendous tax break, including his "highness" emperor Donald, under the "replacement" plan.

As this administration is so arrogant and does not even pretend to cover up their misdeeds, we do get to follow along like kids waiting for the next installment of their Saturday night funnies with the silly, tragic or downright immoral tactics being applied.  The Pres actually threatened legislators with what would happen to them if they did not pass the legislation.  Then he says he never promised it in 64 days and that it's the Democrats' fault. True, he promised it on day One. LOL

Do you suppose he now understands that he is no longer the CEO and dictator of his own company? This is the US of A. We don't follow along as dumbly and blindly as you imagined we would. Then losing face in an open committee hearing (darn broadcast news) that yes, we have been investigating your involvement with Russia and no, there is no evidence that you were wire tapped by President Obama. Though why this didn't come out before the election still rankles.

Then of course his infantile reactions to the Time questions which essentially ended with "...well whatever (facts) I'm President and you're not..." Really? That is the equivalent of childhood taunts of "I'm rubber, you're glue, etc. etc. or the ever popular tongue sticking out going nah nah nah nah nah nah." He is an equal opportunity embarrassment both home and abroad.

After his tough week, (poor baby) he is off to another golf course this weekend, that he owns, where he will "be holding meetings in the clubhouse".  Gosh I do believe I swallowed some vomit there. After claiming he would never be a slug like Obama he will be at work 24/7 not golfing somewhere. 7 times in 8 weeks Donald has been golfing somewhere at tremendous cost and inconvenience to the nation, the States that he drops in on and the cities where he holds property. And whatever happened to his vow (which is an ethics violation btw) that he would not take any money from foreign powers. That of course is ongoing not only for the Donald but for his staff members as well perpetuating deals personally favorable to them who are also covered by the same ethics laws.

The week also saw installation of his daughter in the West Wing with security clearances reserved for the highest advisers?  WTF?  I am going to start my own rumor and see how far it goes. DT is suffering from early stages of Alzheimer's and requires family and trusted scum bags around to cover it up. You heard it here first folks.....

Ok, he did say one thing of value this week.  He pondered that perhaps he needs to work with both sides of the aisle to get things passed.  You think?

AT LEAST HE LOOKED PRESIDENTIAL...

He looked, spoke and acted Presidential in his latest speech to Congress.  Wow, have we lowered the bar or what?  The man has had ample time to grow up and understand the gravity and importance of the post to which he has been elected.  Now I realize he's old and probably wanders around the White House in his robe at 6:30 at night and hanging up on the Australian Prime Minister as"it's late and I'm tired"  Enjoying his nighttime snack of Lay's potato chips. Must be why he has to take every weekend off to go to Florida and play golf. Between his wife in New York, his children's travel and his own trips he has already cost the taxpayer about 11 million??? Not bad for one month.

But really the best 70 to 80 percent of Americans can say is "he seemed Presidential". Again it is early in his administration and I admit it would be hard to offer anything but sweeping campaign-like utterances. Fun Fact:  he claimed 94 million Americans are unemployed. Gosh! But apparently he counted students, retirees and caretakers.  If that number was true then 40% of us are unemployed rather than the true figure of 4%.  Even when he "looks Presidential" he has to use "alternative facts".

 However to give the devil his due, he has managed to nominate bottom feeders to office (another one Sessions) now has links to the Russians. Put a self-proclaimed bigot/racist pig in charge of his administration (the Puppet Master perhaps?) Designated a press secretary that I would love to play poker with as he cannot hide his emotions when he is forced to justify the latest lies and has insulted more than one world leader; held a campaign rally in Florida; created chaos and hatred of immigrants with his impulsive and ill-conceived executive orders; ordered a raid which killed a decorated officer which he now  blames on his generals and Obama.  The buck stops at the Oval Office buddy-get used to it. Suggested a budget to bolster a bloated military at the expense of every program that makes life worth living and admirable in our great country.  Of course if those extra funds are meant to shore up the VA hospitals and staff, increase active soldiers' pay, take care of our homeless vets and supplement military pensions I'm all for it.  But no, it's for shiny new equipment, though to be fair we have to replace the equipment lost on that mission mentioned earlier. And finally, but not all, terrified the 20 million utilizing the Affordable Health Care Act and all folks relying on social security and medicare. Not bad for his first month. 

The list goes on and on.  The hate crimes that have occurred can be laid directly at his door as he has ushered in an era of hatred and fear based on color, religion, ethnic background. If we do not protest these actions this all of course translates into justification for a hard crackdown of our freedoms and totalitarian actions by the federal government, i.e., Trumpet and his cronies. He has attacked the legitimacy and function of the judges and the courts; the concept of a free and unfettered press.  Can the Supreme Court and Congress be far behind? What we are left with is a dictatorship with dissent a hapless victim dealt with in the dark of night.   So many have said it better than I.

"What you do is what matters, not what you think, or say, or plan." (Jason Fried) We know what he thinks. He tweets it like a deranged fool, little old man afraid of his shadow.

"Sentiment without action is the ruin of the soul" (Edward Abbey) Just because he says it doesn't mean he believes it although he has not used any filters up to this point.

And of course the original sentiment.."By their deeds you will know them. Ye shall know them by their fruits" (Matthew 7:16)

Do not be fooled by what a man says, judge him by his deeds.  And thus far his deeds should strike fear.  "We were told and still we persisted".  So we shall.

TEXAN INTERLUDE

Enjoyed a recent trip to Texas hill country near San Antonio. On cue, Michigan weather turned to crap almost to the minute of leaving.  One would hate to travel to a warmer clime in January if Michigan weather was not trash come to think of it.  Of course that led to departure anxiety that the plane would not leave on time.  I tend to cut it close on connection times. Sitting nervously thinking about the connection in Detroit that "WE WERE NOT GOING TO MAKE" I was, however, able to enjoy a plane wash of pure de-icer fluid.  Do you know how long it takes to wash an entire jet liner?  Well, less time than you think actually.

Off the ground straight up and then straight down as Detroit and GR are not really far away from each other by air.  It is still winter in Detroit though and the landing was extremely exciting as the plane slid down to the farthest reaches of the longest runway trying to stop.  From what I could ascertain reversed engines, flaps flapping and the pilots dragging their feet finally brought us to a dramatic halt.  Emergency chutes being deployed were not necessary and we taxied calmly to the gate. Clocks ticking as the pilot gleefully reports that we are a little ahead of schedule. Oh sure.

Those familiar with flying into Detroit Metro from smaller cities know the famous psychedelic underground tunnel that connects the two terminals because, of course, the first plane never gates at the same terminal as their big sister jets.  Thus the frantic rolling walk one perfects on the moving sidewalks while music and an artistic, colorful and moving motif is displayed on the walls.  Something to contemplate and enjoy if one is not skimming the surface at breakneck speed trying to get to the other terminal.  After riding the gigantic escalator we reach the right terminal and realize our gate is wayyyyyy down at the other end.  More frantic walk-run ensues ending with a quick stop at the gate only to discover the flight has been delayed 20 minutes. Really, how anti-climatic.

Though seated in the "economy plus" (extra charge) seats near the front of the plane, I enjoy the sight of the first class passengers a seat ahead receiving "hot breakfast" with real china and silver. Certainly a contrast to my free cup of coffee and 2 oz bag of pretzels tossed my way. For heaven's sake, show some class and close that flimsy, see through curtain separating the elite from steerage. Ah well we all end up a the same destination and we were picked up by a Cadillac owned by our friends so I enjoy my own level of snobbery.  Oddly enough there was only one other Cadillac that passed us as we waited as most of our southern neighbors (and that includes Cincinnati) drive foreign cars like Hyundai and Subaru.   Go figure.

For those not familiar with Texas it contains several different climates and landscapes from temperate to seashore to plains to outright desert along the Rio Grande.  Our destination was the hill country around San Antonio where fortunately we did not have to "rely on the kindness of strangers". Good friends had rented a condo for a month and graciously allowed us room and board.  Containing two bedrooms and two bathrooms guaranteed separation of funkiness, midnight walks and personal space.  The four of us spent our days in "touristy" activities centering mainly on visiting vineyards which are prevalent in the hill country.  Also had the opportunity to visit my first Presidential museum and "alternate" White House.  Apparently wherever a Pres takes a break from the frenzy of Washington becomes the temporary seat of power.

President Johnson, by the guide's estimate, spent about 25% of his time ruling the country from his ranch near Johnson City (not named for him we discovered but for a relative of James Polk).  Several gleefully related that the big guy (Johnson) used the ranch as a sort of benevolent prison where he could isolate both domestic and foreign leaders to "sell" his agenda.  At 6'4" intimidation was part of his arsenal.  However the ranch house itself was rather cozy and I felt like I could move right in and be comfortable.  There were televisions and phones everywhere and in every room. In fact the first remote control color television was installed in his home office where he constantly adjusted the channel from his desk.  He only watched the news, although sweet fact - Lady Bird had a thing for James Arness and Gunsmoke so her sitting room was tuned a different way....

 Sobering piece of history. A dinner party was planned there on November 22, 1963 with guests arriving from Dallas later that day.  As the kitchen staff were preparing the meal, they tuned into the  news coverage of the motorcade and thus saw the horrible history-changing footage that vaulted Johnson to the presidency.  The kitchen clock was stopped at 1:00 that day and has never been restarted.

One of the entertaining features of our visit to hill country, was driving around.  Holy Macaroni! They "got's" some hills.... and valleys... and canyons... and drop-offs. Built around the meandering rivers surrounding the area the breathtaking elevations of the roads were only surpassed by the surprising hairpin curves that popped up frequently throughout any drive.  The flood gauges that decorated any low spot were a sobering indicator what can happen after a major rain.  In Michigan, we'd just build a bridge, but things are different in Texas.  Another interesting fact that I never got a clear answer for was every house, ranch, trailer was surrounded by fencing and a locked gate.  Hmmm. Keeping the public out or the inmates in  (well there are a lot of cows).

Also I am convinced that much like Florida, many of the residents are from "somewhere else"! Especially during the wine tastings, our host would have a very distinct Midwestern accent.  I of course asked and collected people from Illinois, Iowa, Michigan (Owosso), etc.  The reason was always the same.  Came down here for a visit and stayed.  However most restaurants were staffed with the true genuine southern article and so polite.  Please, thank you and your welcome Ma'am or Sir jarred a bit when we returned to Michigan where a thank you is met with a "no problem".  Well I should hope not.